Author deanna

we’re just trying to move forward

These were interesting words–as Don had pointed out, likely not sourced directly from my mother but from other sources though ultimately it doesn’t matter anymore. I have a point to make. Here, in rational land where people don’t have magical… Continue Reading →

nevermind. I’m not going

This life is stressful enough without adding more to be upset about, I’ve realized. I can’t go. The ultimate voice of reason (my mother)–now this is my mother mother, my mom, as it were, knocked some sense into me. How… Continue Reading →

gradients of consideration

So this has been a tough few days and it certainly hasn’t lengthened my life in any way, the amount of stress I am going through right now. It’s almost as if my birth mother wasn’t present and didn’t hear… Continue Reading →

repetition feeds the hurt

Well world…your lessons are a little fucked up lately. Not thrilled with the things running through my head. I tend to be a little bit of a masochist in some ways–I read that damn letter over and over and thought…with… Continue Reading →

a cure for complaining

I know I know. Gratitude is the antidote to complaint–being grateful for anything has a way of turning you off the trends of complaint. I am sure if you found this place you probably have a point of empathy you… Continue Reading →

closer to the edge but I haven’t fallen off yet

My mind is a mean thing–I blame it in some ways for the destruction wrought on my body. I try to control where it goes but it’s a hard thing to do when you have been conditioned as I have… Continue Reading →

a little bit of anxiety to fuel the questioning…

Poor Don is a little bewildered to our situation and I am also finding it hard not to lose my goddamn mind right now. These are the times I wish I had some stash of anti anxiety cures but I… Continue Reading →

look at all these themes my life brings…

Well that was an unfortunate thing to have to write yesterday but I felt a need to remark it. After I read over it, it seemed kind of whiney diary-yy so I edited it, as you must do with your… Continue Reading →

the diplomacy of assholes

Oh world–you aren’t gonna be easy. Part of the reason I live in Denver was to try and get to know my birth family a little more intimately because really–getting to know people who look like you and sometimes do… Continue Reading →

should we stay or should we go

Hmmm is the answer to that question. One thing I am convinced of is I don’t want to be in a country and around people who were keen to sell us off to the highest bidder. Us, I mean, the… Continue Reading →

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