So, I did the thing I said I was going to do and cut myself off yesterday. Yesterday was Day 1, for some perspective. This plan was more of a Pepsi challenge of, can she do it? Can you do it I asked myself yesterday and proved to myself that, yes, I absolutely can. I cut myself off right at 1 pm my time and stayed off until 7:15. I know, 45 minutes short but keep in mind my efforts were new and also keep in mind for the girl who talks to nobody, cutting myself off for that long just really emphasizes and solidifies that isolation almost more so that had I just left it open to do what I wanted over having rules that are largely un-fun.

What did I do? I drew and ordered books and cooked a bunch. I had a Barnes and Noble gift card I got from my old job two years ago and redeemed that and then re-signed up for the BOTM club. That being Book of the Month. Now, I know a lot of snooty assholes think the books offered might not hit their high caliber of literary snoot to partake, but if you feel so inclined, click HERE for more information as I believe you can get the first for much cheaper than I did and cancel anytime. I already have my future mini library of books from that service so I can attest that sometimes ANY book is far better for the soul and mind than EVERY social media platform. I also found a farm to do a Farm share with so we will be getting food through that for at least through November. It’s a thing I have entertained for years and seems the right time with that whole supporting local business angle they want us all on.

Oh and one friend did ask me to Zoom or Facetime, whatever it is, allowing me to feel definitely a lot less despised, so that was nice. Nobody has asked me to do that and so it was a nice breath of oh, so not everyone hates me recognition you sometimes need to keep going. And technically I need nobody besides Don exactly, but isn’t it nice when people see what you might need and offer you a way to fulfill that–sweet indeed.

So, looks like people are all in to die for the economy which is a shock to nobody with a brain. Let them go, let them just go. It’s not like Trump supporters are demure and you won’t be able to recognize them in a crowd and promptly take yourself out of their line of sight or get away from them if you happen to almost be sharing space with them–they are hateful and loud people who want you to know how much they love him and hate you. Someone did a pretty slick waiver for people to sign suggesting they wouldn’t use hospital resources and be open for financial liability for any passed sickness to others, so my prayers were answered. Let them just go. Trying to argue with people about how they might spend money as corpses is just not a winning strategy. Ironically every Trump supporter I know lost their jobs but not a peep about any critique, so if you thought they could grow past their hate, you are very very wrong.

So, today? Today I am also banned. I got my period so I want to chuck shoes, sit in the bath and eat chocolate. Sitting on social media arguing with a bunch of people who cannot think for themselves seems like an especially BAD use of time. So, won’t do it. I already have talked to Don, I already have picked up my weekly groceries and 6 lbs of mandarins. I do need to get to Target but on a Sunday seems like a dumb idea–I need freezer containers for the food I cooked for him.

I am not exercising today because no. The extent of my exercise previously was dog walks and sex. Now it is dog walks and mini inside dance parties, because nobody can say they don’t like that. Reading, yes absolutely. I also have a print to make for a card I am going to need to send out to a friend who gave me his address when I asked for it pining about the postal service so I will do that and send another copy to my grandmother in Arizona. If I can do that, I am a winner. So what if I was on the phone for nearly 4 hours last night talking to a friend got less than 4 hours sleep. Ugh, not the best plan–I am hurting now but dark chocolate was on the order for with the groceries this am so there is that. Between that and blueberries, BOOM. Satisfied.

And now is Day 2 of my new plan of accomplishment. I know I am impressed, aren’t you, too? 😉 haha