Jesus christ the world is going to shit.

Someone really should be paying me to write, because my opinions are spot on, and everyone is a fucking idiot. Did I just write that? Fuck yes, I did and fuck you all for being so dense. I guess the luxury I have is a life that allows me a hell of alot of time to ponder shit and think about things a few steps further than most.

Today was day 2 and yeah, shit’s hit the fan in Alabama and a host of other stupid places none of us generally go to anyways. The missing piece I think everyone is not recognizing in this situation is this:

A person who doesn’t exist cannot have an opinion whether or not they existed.

A person who does not exist cannot be hurt or abused or conversely, treated well and pampered because they do not exist.

Our opinions are what give the entire argument meaning, because WE are the ones left with the result of our actions. Abortions, intended births and miscarriages are fucking very very personal experiences which should not be litigated over by people who are not a part of the situation. To endure an abortion is torture enough without heaping more punishment on an obviously terrible situation to be left in feeling like you had to be involved in having.

I think part of us must be sick to want to get that heavily and headily involved in situations which, at the terrible end of it, result in someone not being born and will not have the consciousness nor be born either way to care about what that even fucking means. WE are the ones attributing meaning and life and existence to something that has no consciousness of its own realized. Why are WE even allowed to do that in the lives of other people? Ultimately you hope we are still allowed to maintain some level of autonomy because a forced pregnancy on a woman who doesn’t want it? She ends up being a host and yes, dead bodies seem to have more rights than some of these women at the ends of these laws.

Probably not the best way to raise a compassionate society living in a world that will be literally on fire–you know how angry people in hot weather get, well, we are going to chuck a bunch of unwanted kids to the wind to live in a world we poured gas on almost literally–because we are kind and compassionate enough to care about the life of the unborn. How on earth do we even reason with ourselves this way?

I read a few ludicrous comments from people commenting on how they were adopted and wanted to thank Alabama for hearing their side and I just wanted to vomit, ultimately. Good, you are grateful being born but you clearly haven’t realized that if you weren’t born you wouldn’t have an opinion either way because you would not have been born. The crazy thing about this world is guess what, it would have gone on without you existing, I promise.

That’s been my commentary and I get to pull out the I was adopted card and state the obvious. Clearly me being aborted would be more of a problem for you than it would be for me but guess what, I wouldn’t exist for you to have an issue either way. Arguing with me, “well you could have been aborted aren’t you glad you weren’t?” is the world’s stupidest fucking question. Clearly I am glad I wasn’t, but you also could have been aborted aren’t you glad you weren’t? Point is we should still have control over our own bodies to keep this shit a non-issue. A parasitic relationship relies on a host and if the host is unready or un-wanting–well, JFC we might want to review some things.

Our priorities are certainly out of whack not promising basic things like healthcare and burdening a child on a person who might be totally alone nor wanting to be a mother. Some women just shouldn’t either, which is another point worth making.

With that being said, tomorrow I am adding my story to the whole conversation. Yes, my abortion, which I might have alluded to a few times but never documented well. I am writing it here and we will see how I feel about any of it. If nothing else it will be mine.

Also–on the IG angle, that’s still coming AND– It’s okay I read some things recently that made the idea of getting photographed at least a lot more comforting. Most of these girls who are influencers heavily heavily edit. Not gonna do it. There is no point beyond basic filters or skin corrections to do that. They pinch their waists hell I saw some shrinking noses and though mine isn’t shrinking, certainly there’s no point in giving yourself a fucking digital nose-job. Notevergonnadoit. Look for that story tomorrow and then hopefully we get back on the format train.

I am just emotionally beaten today…and for people not to realize that pregnant women in these states will be side-eyed after a point, people wondering, shit, did you want that, or did we want that for you? What about their children? Is that going to feel like a super wanted part of their society? Hell they can’t move or abort and miscarry without being physically dragged back to the state. Who does that? Men who have some serious fucking grudges is who, because that is beyond reproach. But the governor is clearly also a garbage person so hopefully they ALL get voted out.