So…got one down yesterday, and though I have a mounting headache up in the noggin, it’s that whole remark the life you might forget that compels me to try this again. So yes, two in a row in the first three days, is that right? Mmm Hmm. So today I interviewed for a more paying position in my job. Granted me making any bit more is just really more to take later or try to take, but there is something to be said for being challenged (albeit only slightly moreso). What that something is I will let you know later but it’s a new job but is the job I have been doing. Just with more cash money is all. It won’t do a hell of a lot to my paycheck since I get almost 40% knocked for taxes and benefits as it is. It’s a glamorous life but I won’t even be making $20 an hour with this promotion, far from it…. but that’s what someone without a college degree gets, the scraps.

I feel the need to remark I have the same job I would have had with no degree, but then I wonder why (I feel the need to remark anything here). This could mean not finishing leaves you the same as if you never went so finish, but I will take my own lesson out of it and completely ignore the fact I never fucking finished. My lesson is, I fucked up and never should have gone. I didn’t need A’s from Columbia to prove my own genius and self-worth, I already knew it. A’s don’t pay the bills and have the same buying power as D’s and F’s and invisible grades for the classes you never took. They are just personalized trophies of sorts to show a win or finish on a battle you could never explain properly to another person without them enduring the same.

I know, I know, this is the same company. The company that tried to kill my husband (no, they did and did not care), but you do see me with a giant smile on my face most days because whatever. Being hateful, disagreeable, not happy just makes you those things at the end of the day. They are highly irresponsible and not as great as I say all day long, but at the end of the day telling the truth all the time is not going to be paying my bills in the slightest. I could have sued them for negligence and would have won, but I am not a litigious creature and I despise it as a function of some people’s lives. They’ve been around a while, sure, but that’s all I feel qualified to say positively right now about them. What that been around for a while denotes is all the stuff you would expect with age, but are they special, really?

Thinking you see the path I am painting here and could answer that. But one thing you might have noticed about me over the years with how many jobs have I had, half a dozen in a decade at minimum–I barely talk about them at all. I never try to fully identify these companies because the internet is a place of maps that no company I have ever worked for has figured out how to find me through but that’s just luck. Or, maybe they never looked. One thing you do not do is befriend ANY HR people for any company you work for and you are golden. Also, if you do mention the company by name, best to do it only once or twice, people’s memories are fickle and they will forget the shitty stuff you have said about them and that is ok. Some deserve a second chance, and some are just shitty the first second and third times.

Second chances are for companies kinda like they are for people as well–they can EARN them anyways, but they are not a given. Really, the moral of that story is sometimes second chances are a waste of your time. I will let you know later which column this one ended up sitting inside.