After my whining yesterday, I decided f it, and that I would do whatever I wanted. I didn’t run free to the beach like I normally would want to, but that was more due to my manufactured guilt that so much needed to be done and a beach day would be a middle finger to my own responsibility.

So I spent a good part of the day hallucinating that I was cleaning and watching some wedding proposal show on the style network, which later flipped to this reality show called split ends–it’s a show where typically a very upscale hairdresser switches salons with a smaller salon owner. I think I watched that for several hours and messed around on the net. I bought a dress for a wedding E and I are going to in July for his friend Ryan. Ryan was a finalist in Rockstar Supernova, and he and his fiance are both jewish, so I had to pick something appropriate for the day without being too boring. I am not sure how the tattoos would go over, so I got a black dress with flowers that kind of blends with the tattoos I have already. It’s a beach formal request, so I really hope it works out.

Then I went to the city to get some bras at the semi-annual sale at VS. I have decided to “embrace the bra” and stop trying to hide it under all of these very difficult shirts. So I went in looking for a hideous turquoise or magenta bra. I failed at that but got a bright orange one, a dark purple one, a white and a nude one. I have decided to “hussy it out” as my mother used to say because it just does not matter. I don’t want to have to layer shit up just to cover a bra, so I am now exposing myself…

Then I went to American apparel and see if I could find a pair of shorts to squeeze my fat ass into. Somehow I have morphed into an XL
(I was a M last year). I have not worn shorts in a while and the 7’s I had last year might fit over one thigh. So I got a pair and a skirt since the world of hot shorts might be eluding my ass for a while.

I stopped at Trader Joes, got some food, and came home. I hung with the wups for a while, cooked some dinner, and organized some fun time with a co-worker. She has gone through some shit as of late, and has finally started showing some gumption after being completely manipulated by her ex. We hung out at a bar where I happened to know the bartender from some 7 years ago…and after 4 or 5 drinks I was not drunk somehow. I got home as the sun was coming up and I started feeling very adult/kid all wrapped into one. I can count on two hands how many times I have come home that late (with the exception of my window jumping days) in my life. It’s sad but true, but was a bizarre ego boost to do.

Today I have to do some work fun, laundry, cleaning, and might squeeze in some McCarren park pool party time in there. I am not sure how the bands might be today, but it’s an option.

How about this summer, man? Last year was the worst, and with only a few days in, I am very happy with all of this sun shiney goodness.

So now I am off to do it all. Miami Vice is in the background–anyone remember the days of Crockett and Tubbs? It’s an interesting take on bad fashion if nothing else.

I am also back for more. More often even.